As a person whose love language is gift giving, I get extra excited when Christmas time comes around. I’m the kind of person who loves surprising my friends with little things all year round. If I happen to see something that reminds me of someone, like a keychain inspired by a video game or a little plushie that looks like their pet, I tend to get it for them. This year, however, got me thinking. While my family and all my friends tell me that they appreciate the trinkets and knick knacks I surprise them with, and that I am very sweet for it, I’ve started wondering if my little gifts could have even more meaning. How else might I give to those I care about?
Shifting Perspectives: From Trinkets to Thoughtful Gestures
As a graduate of psychology and as my friends and I get older, I’ve started shifting to giving gifts with deeper meaning and purpose. This deeper meaning and purpose that I search for revolves around wanting to give a kind of lasting happiness, and something that can help improve their overall well-being. Rather than just seeing something cute and getting it for the person it made me think of, I’ve started asking myself “Is this something that can enhance or sustain their welfare, apart from being something they might want?”
Practical Gifts That Enhance Well-being
The gifts do not have to be extravagant, like getting them a puppy or a personal trainer. There are many little ways that gifts can help improve someone’s mood or mental state. For example, I would give my artist friends new art supplies. Apart from these supplies being things they want, I also know that it would help them sustain their positive mood, since art is not just a hobby but also a kind of therapy for them. For my dance and theater friends, I liked giving them sportswear, hair and makeup supplies, and even Salonpas, since I knew that these would cater long term to their interests and aid in what brings them joy.
The Gift of Time: A Treasure Beyond Material Things
More than the material things, I’ve come to find that the best present is time. Giving your time to someone, or a group of people, can come in many forms. For some, spending time together is in the form of gaming online, which allows us to enjoy an activity we all take interest in and engage in as a way of de-stressing. For others, spending time would be one on one, maybe at a nice cafe over coffee and brunch, or maybe shopping at the mall. Sometimes it’s just being able to keep each other company, whether it is on call or in someone’s living room. And, sometimes, giving time is simply being available – being there to listen when someone needs an ear, being a safe space or a shoulder to cry on, someone who could be confided in and who could offer some pieces of advice, someone who wouldn’t mind being called in the middle of the night if a friend or loved one is in distress, and someone who will be there no matter what.
Truly, it is the thought that counts behind the gift.
About The Author
S. Verzosa is a BS Psychology graduate from the Ateneo de Manila University. Lover of fiction, art, music, dance, and the understanding of all those around.
